The inability of individual providers to coordinate care outside their expertise is alarming. Recently I helped a son whose mother had surgery and went for rehab at a nursing home. The surgery went well, however mom experienced a great deal of stress and anxiety which resulted in her reverting to past issues of mental health. The rehab facility, trying to be helpful, asked their physician and social worker (neither versed in mental health) to visit. Medications were prescribed that resulted in a psychotic event and subsequent emergency room visit. Despite requests from the son, the emergency room staff was unable or unwilling to help with a formal psychiatric evaluation and sent mom back to the nursing home now with the requirement of a 24 hour sitter because she was considered a “danger to herself”. Needless to say the son was flabbergasted and felt like he was failing to care for his mother. It’s unfortunate but these situations are becoming more prevalent. Individual providers are good at their expertise but due to time constraints, rules and regulations are unable to help beyond their expertise. If you are a family member don’t feel like you’re failing your loved one by going beyond your health care provider for assistance. Many times it’s necessary.
Archive for December, 2008
Why does it seem that health care issues happen during the holidays? Perhaps it’s because of the additional stress everyone is feeling over the need to create the “perfect” holiday. During the past two weeks I’ve met many families experiencing health issues. Whether it’s a cold weather related ailment like pneumonia or a health event related to a hospitalization or surgery the situations are complicated by different factors. In some situations, children have come home for the holidays to find themselves now involved in situations of care. In others the situation has been going on for a while and just became more complicated. But regardless of the situation the fortunate aspect is that most of these individuals have someone to care about or to care for them; this in itself is a gift. No matter how you find yourself this holiday season, be thankful for the gift of a friend or family member who can help in a time of need.
My husband and I spent this most recent Thanksgiving with his family in Seattle. As expected the weather was rainy and cold but the mood was bright. The family, mixed with grandparents, parents, extended and mixed families got along splendidly. Sam’s cousin enjoyed having a multitude of family members meet the twin boys for the first time and also to provide a break from care. I was amazed that there was no rush to get everyone out of the house after the holiday. We spent several days eating, visiting, seeing movies, and sharing old stories with some family members I hadn’t seen in nearly fifteen years. The airports were virtually empty and in spite of our travel issues (rental car company closed, no hot water upon check-in etc.) we had a great time with the family. Sometimes caring for others is simply giving of your time.
How many of you recently read the newspaper about the young family who passed away due to a carbon monoxide issue in their home? This news article caught the attention of many of my clients and readers. I’ve been recently asked about CO-2 alarms and where to obtain them. As I do with most home improvement items, Home Depot is the place. They have a CO-2/fire alarm for about $50 dollars. Looking for a practical gift for someone this holiday? It may not be glamorous but it may save a life.
It’s the time of year that the cold – flu thing is going around. I always claim to be super healthy, which I usually am, but once every other year or so I get it. It is usually a nasty head cold that begins with a sore throat, moves into my ears and then had my head running like a faucet. I tried to go to bed early the other night and decided I was not going to be able to sleep because I simply couldn’t breathe and waiting to go to the doctor until the next day wasn’t a good idea nor was I really sick enough to spend time in the emergency room. So, at 7:30 pm in the evening I drove myself to Rocky Mountain Urgent Care. What a pleasant surprise. I was greeted quickly, got in to see a doctor within the hour and was sent home with several prescriptions that I filled at Walgreen’s late night pharmacy. While I have no idea how my health insurance will reimburse for this, I’m sure it has to be less than an emergency room visit where I would have likely sat for hours only to arrive home sometime in the middle of the night. In this case, I was home and in bed by 10pm with my inhaler, nasal spray and cough medicine and on the way to a better night’s sleep. I realize that everyone’s experience may differ, but check out www.rockymountainurgentcare.com if you have a medical issue that happens after hours and isn’t serious enough to warrant a trip to the emergency room or a call to 911.
I am always amazed by the dedication of spouses in caring for a loved one even if the situation is not dire. I recently met a married couple, one of whom was diagnosed with early Alzheimer ’s disease. While the wife is not able to work, she is able to remain at home with minimal supervision. The husband who is in his fifties has turned his life around to care for his wife. My husband often asks if I would do the same for him or as he says, “If this ever happens to me, put on my skis and take me out to the back bowls of Copper Mountain”. I always joke, since I’m not a skier and say that I’d have to have one of his friends do this because if I took him to the back bowls of Copper Mountain neither of us would be coming back, or at least he would have a better chance than I since I’m not a skier. In any event, my admiration and my depth of personal learning continues to grow as I see the increase in situations like this. It makes me appreciate even more the life I have and realize that we must have a little bit of joy in every day because we really do not know what is just around the corner.
It’s difficult to care for yourself when you feel guilty about help you’re receiving from others. A male client of mine has his mother living with him to provide care for his wife who has multiple sclerosis and other health complications. He works two jobs and cares for his wife on the weekends. His mother who has been helping for three years is at the point of exhaustion and burn out. He has mentioned that the world would be better “without him” at least his wife would then receive care somewhere. He has applied for Medicaid but is on the waiting list for a number of care facilities and doesn’t know how much longer he can hold out. This situation is increasingly common as younger individuals in their 30’s, 40’s and 50’s are experiencing health transitions that require a substantial amount of care. No one expects to find them in this situation but many do, and then what?
I know I’ve talked about support groups before but I’ve recently come across a new group as I was searching for a PTSD (post traumatic stress disorder) group. The group is called Meetup and to explain, I’ll copy a few words from their website: “Meetup’s about using the Internet to get off the Internet. With Meetup, you’ll find and join Meetup Groups about any topic you can imagine. But unlike regular online social networks, you’ll actually meet with members of those groups in the real world. Meetup’s mission is to revitalize local community and help people around the world self-organize. We believe people can change their personal world and even the whole world by organizing themselves into groups that share a common interest or goal. Whatever that interest or goal may be, Meetup knows that when people meet face to face in the real world great things happen!” These groups are not just support groups; they are skiing groups, knitting groups, groups of people with common interests. For more information go to www.meetup.com or email support@meetup.com
It seems I’ve met quite a few people in the past couple of weeks. I am hearing more about how giving up driving whether optional or not results in a feeling of isolation. Even though there are programs here in Denver some make it difficult to actually access services. Access-A-Ride is one of the main transportation providers. They provide a wonderful service for disabled and other persons unable to drive due to sight issues. The trick, however is that Access-A-Ride requires an in person interview. Now this would beg the question, if someone is disabled and cannot drive, how can an isolated person physically get to the Access-A-Ride location for an interview? Anyone out their have any ideas besides hiring a private service or as many do not want to do ask a friend or a family member for transportation?
I met an amazing married couple today both in their mid-nineties and still healthy and able and one would never guess their age, or at least I missed by about a decade. Their oldest daughter is seventy years old and the youngest is fifty. I asked their secret. Both stated that staying active is important. Millie still quilts, crochets and stays up with the latest news. She said she recently had to give up hiking due to an issue with her ankle. Robert, her husband remains active with gardening in good weather and still walks outside; he is an avid researcher of holistic health. We talked about their health and the fact that we all shared a belief in vitamins and natural remedies versus medications if at all possible. They let me onto their secret, a naturopath who lives in Indian Hills. I am a strong believer that the better we care for ourselves at whatever age the better and more able we will be in our older years. I’ll see if I can invite Diane, the holistic practitioner to comment.
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